Posted by @jayemcken
Today I’m coming out with a first-time, sex-story.
Early Sexual Initiation… Big words for ‘sex at an early age’ or even sex before legal age of consent. Not a phenomenon really. Losing one’s virginity is hardly special anymore. It’s the Caribbean reality that girls and boys younger than… let’s say 14 years old are engaging in some level of sexual behaviour.
The world we live in doesn’t make it easier to stand up to sexual urges. Sex, sex, sex! It’s everywhere. Ready or not, it always comes.
I remember having sex for the very first time… barely scraping the legal age of consent. I was the gem of my mother’s eyes (still am), an intellectual, and a brilliant student who made ridiculously good grades. I attended a traditional high school where I was placed in the top 10 every term. I was also a devoted “Christian”… religion I realized however was no cure for horniness. Sexual urges happen. A ‘conscious yute’ isn’t immune to them. Ready or not, it will come.
You see, what many people fail to understand is that human sexuality is just that… human. And with being human come the natural thoughts and feelings about sex that can lead to sexual actions. As early as we become curious about our bodies we also become curious about other people’s bodies – ready or not.
In retrospect I wished I had waited, before having, what was, for me, a meaningless sexual experience at age 14. Even more important, I wish I had a trusting adult or youth-friendly source to help weigh the decision of being ready or not.
Ready or not, many young people, as young as I was, will decide to make a test-run on the field without being sure that they are prepared for sex. Pointing us in the right direction isn’t encouraging us to have sex. Your guidance multiplies the possibility that we will be empowered to make better and safer decisions. Providing us with condom negotiation and safer-sex skills reduces the chances of unplanned pregnancies and the desire or need for abortions.
STI’s like HIV don’t seem to be disappearing any time soon. And if the early dialogue about sex is put off, trust me STI’s, HIV, and unplanned, teenage pregnancies are more prone to follow.
Ultimately, empowering us with sexual health information means we’ll make choices that could prevent contracting STIs like HIV. It’s as simple as that. Sex is not a taboo. Safe, consensual sex can be a wonderful experience for people who know what they are doing… Humans are sexual beings, and there is danger when we refuse to talk about it. Knowledge is power. Sex is going to happen. If not at 14, then it probably will occur at 44. Ready or not, it will come. Ignorance isn’t bliss. AIDS is proof, that what you don’t know can kill you.
Truth is, many adults and parents are themselves oblivious to the facts about safer sexual skills and they better realize that their #epicfail could contribute to our mistakes.